Welcome to the Real World

After graduation, Dean and I attended our local junior college. I went so that I could spend time with Dean, not because I had any real plans of getting a degree. You see, college was never stressed, or even talked about in our home growing up. It just wasn't something that mattered. Girls got married and became stay-at-home moms, and boys went to work at nearby chemical plants. That is what my parents did, and most families that I knew. I don't fault my parents for not encouraging something more; it was all they knew.

Dean and I worked out our schedules so that we had all of our classes together. We both got jobs. Mine was in the continuing education department at our school. His was as a carpenter's helper. We began to attend church together, something that Dean had never done. Through that church, we met many friends, and Dean was able to play on the church's basketball league. Things were moving in the direction that we both wanted, and it was only a matter of time before we were married with a family.....I was sure of it.

When Dean asked me to marry him, I was ecstatic! It was a sweet moment that he put a ton of thought and preparation into. Although I wasn't sure at first, it became clear by his nervousness as the night went on, that Dean would be proposing to me........I mean to be honest, I had been hoping for and anticipating it. It was, of course, the next step. He had saved for that engagement ring for so long, and I knew he was now broke. We both were! So, we decided that in order to have enough money for our wedding, and to prepare for our new life together, we needed new jobs.......Higher paying ones.

Through our church, Dean found a good job. He was working for the city. However, it was a full-time job, so he had to quit attending college during the day. Night classes were available for his certificate as an instrument tech at a chemical plant, so that's what he did. I didn't have a clue what I was going to do. One day, on the way to school, I just dropped in an Attorney's office on a whim. After speaking with the attorney, he hired me on the spot as a secretary.

I still lived at home, but my parents' constant fighting kept me at Dean's most of the time. They did start spending more and more time away, however, with their new business. My mom had been going to nursing school too, and was about to graduate. When Dean rented his own place, I was thrilled to stay with him as much as I could. My parents did not approve, but rarely enforced their rule of me not staying the night at his house.

In fact, I began spending most nights with Dean. And although we struggled with having sex before marriage, (something we both felt convicted of since attending church and becoming familiar with the Bible) we continued. Even though I was on birth control, I was still an immature teenager who sometimes missed a pill or two.........and I became pregnant.