Monday, February 1, 2010

He has a Face

I have to interrupt my story to write about a new development.......I told you in the beginning that it was on going.

Today has been a really weird day, to say the least. I've been tending to two sick children, which is always quite a bummer, as I so hate it when they feel bad. I'm happy to report that it looks like we are "out of the woods."

Anyway, I recently received a friend request from someone on Facebook. Over two weeks ago, when she sent it to me, I was puzzled because I didn't know who she was. Normally, I'll look over the person's friend list if I don't immediately recognize them to trigger my memory. When I did this, nothing made sense......But, her maiden name was the same last name of the guy who molested me when I was four. I decided to ask someone that I am close to who had her as a friend on Facebook. After much discussion and research, we finally confirmed that this girl was related to my perpetrator.

Even though this girl had done nothing to me, I will admit, the whole situation really freaked me out. It is times like these that I want to cancel my account....retreat......be completely under the radar--stealth. It all just felt too close. I won't do this, though. It's not me.....I'll not live my life like that. However, I'll be more cautious from now on who I let into my life......Even through Facebook. I'm so happy that I didn't confirm her without further investigating.

So, this whole thing started a bigger endeavor. I never remembered the face of J.B., the guy who molested me. When I think back to what he looks like, I remember only some things, but his face is always a smudge and blur of distortion. As I mentioned in an earlier post about my molestation, I always wondered if he did this to anyone else, among other things. As my friend and I investigated further, we ran across a man with the same name as my perpetrator....the same age......from the same town I'm from. His name is an obscure one, so I felt sure it was him. The only way to confirm this, was to ask my mother.

You see, we found him on the state's public sex offenders registry website. There are four photos of him, which seem to correlate the number of offenses with the dates of offense. When I laid my eyes on him, I didn't remember that being his face, but my gut told me it was him. I just knew it. When I say that this guy is creepy, it doesn't even begin to explain it. His sinister smiles in his mug shots say what words cannot. He obviously has no clue the depth of hurt he has caused, and has no remorse either.

I sent my mother the link to the page from the sex offenders registry via email. First, I called her to tell her what I was sending, and asked her if she was alright with it. I was so worried about her and how it would affect her. She agreed to view it. Today, I received an email from my mother.

It read:
So sorry, yes it is...

This man is J.B.! My worst fears have come to pass. He has done this to others........Who knows how many?! I had hoped that because he was found out when he molested me, that he'd never do it again. They say sex predators have a sickness....an addiction--That once they do something like this, it is likely not the last time. Guess what his offenses are?.......You guessed it. Crimes against children. It makes me sick......I'm so disgusted! This man is vile! My heart is heavy for the "others." Tonight, I pray for them........for healing......restoration......

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